Finding inspiration
In the midst of objection
Channels affection to the meaningless
And attention to the profitless
The feelings that envelope
The optimism that elopes
Succumb to the fear of annihilation
And the distress of renunciation
The silence of withdrawal
Reaches out to the voice of laxity
The utterance of affinity
Fetches an audience of insensitivity
The leaf that floats on the river of desolation
Hitches on the rock of expectation
Exalting its feet of abjection
Magnifying its air of inclination.
Well, this is my first ever poem I’m writing after I had inspiration from Jess, Obed and Josephine. I never thought of writing a poem in the first place.I think it’s an effort, I tried! I’m hoping my next poems would be better than this one.
Eliezer Bernard Owusu Ntim
Photocredit: GoogleImages
Very good effort for a first poem. Poetry is simply prose that is direct and emotion based. Take out ‘the’ ‘and’ ‘of’ ‘to’. Reduce the poem to the essence of your thoughts. You mentioned above to feel free to correct and shape your poem, so I took the liberty of doing so. I hope that is okay. Best wishes in your future poetry. I also love basketball.
In objection’s midst, found
inspiration channeled,
affection for meaningless,
profitless gain attention
eloped with optimism
feelings enveloped, succumb
to fear, distressed annihilation
renunciation of hope
silence withdraws support
voice of laxity outreach
utterances without affinity
insensitive audience fetched
upon turbid desolation, leaf
floats, river parts rock, expectations
hitch at exalted feet, abjection
magnifies air of inclination
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Wow! It feels so much better now! Thanks!
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a great first poem! many congrats & wishes for more 🙂
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Thank you!
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Great for a first attempt!
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Thank you! 😊
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This is goooooood. The future is brighter…
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Thanks Phelyks! You think I can do a spoken word right?
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I think? I KNOW you can. Hahaha. Give it a try…
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I will bro! I will!
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It was lovely with the photo.
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Thank you!!
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Great first attempt..I have some unfinished poems as well
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Try and finish them.. the world has to see them..
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Lovely work. I’ll need this on my inspirational blog http://www.kingdien.com. You can check out my lovely work.
I do hope to get a reply
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Wonderful blog
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Thanks. Will love to connect with you though, maybe through emails.
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Alright!
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Loved your vocabulary , wish I could write like you and if this was your first attempt then god knows what wonderful poem you’ll write next , simply spot on. Best wishes sir.
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Thank you!
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